Monday, December 20, 2010

"Tomorrow if a golden train came to take me away, would you go or would you stay?"

I don't have the most commonplace idea of "Family."
We hear so many times "You can't choose your family" or "I love them because they're my family" etc. I don't believe that this is what "family" is. "Family" Is not the people you are related to. The parents I was born to, the siblings I grew up with, these people are my Relatives. I'm not saying Family and Relatives can't be the same people, but they are not synonymous definitions. To me, Family is defined by the people who you want in your every day life, your support system. the people who make you feel safe to be who you are, to be open and warm and loved, those people who you know don't ever want to hurt you, those who lift you up, fight for you, would die for you, help you and want to see you do well. Maybe I'm biased, but this idea of family, is not what most people's "relatives" are.

I have some pretty shitty relatives.


My children, will not be my relatives. they will be my family. My best friends, the two of them are my family. The love of my life is my family, my sister is my family. My aunt who took me in when I had nothing and helped me build a new life, is my family.

The people who sat with me and held my hair back as I shook and cried and was sick with grief, who told me to get out of bed and move on, the people who stayed in my life when everyone else walked out, the people who I'd do the very same for,
They are my family.

My family is a wonderful group of people. And I'm so blessed to have them in my life, in whatever capacity they can be. I love my family. Even though I've built it piece by piece on my own, at this point in my life, I wouldn't have it any other way.

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